


Running Away With Me

by girlimjusttryingto



Category: BLACKPINK (Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, One Shot, at the end, one shots, only a little bit tho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-01
Updated: 2020-12-01
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:27:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27821497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/girlimjusttryingto/pseuds/girlimjusttryingto
Summary: In which Jennie Kim proposes the idea of running away together forever.
Relationships: Jennie Kim | Jennie Kim/Reader, Jennie Kim/Reader, Jennie/Reader
Kudos: 14





	Running Away With Me

**Author's Note:**

> TW: implication of self-harm / suicide / depression but doesn't go too much into it.  
> hope you are doing well :)

"Let's run away together."

You raise your eyebrows, shocked. The idea doesn't sound horrible— not in the slightest, but it's so abrupt. It's so out of nowhere, and most of all, it's just unrealistic. You guys were only in high school. How were you two going to make a living for yourselves? How were you going to even be able to pack your bags without raising suspicion? You weren't the closest with your mom, but you couldn't imagine worrying her like that.

As if sensing your hesitation, Jennie turns her head to you. You both are sitting on a log at the back of some warehouse where a big party is going on. It's a fun night, and there's a fun concert inside, but Jennie wasn't in the mood to have fun. She just wanted to sit with you. Now that you think about it, she'd probably wanted to propose the idea to you the whole time, seeming more reserved than usual all night, like there was something on her mind. There's a firepit in front of you, and the flames are bright on her face. She looks so beautiful. You don't believe it would take much convincing for you to agree to run away with her, and while the thought scares you, you sit and wait for her to speak.

"I know it sounds crazy, okay?" She says, her eyes vulnerable. By the way she bites her lip, you can tell she's afraid you'll call her crazy and leave. But that's not you, so you take her hand and squeeze it to reassure her it's okay. She sends you a soft smile at the action, twisting your hands so that she can lace your fingers together and hold them in a tight clasp. Taking a deep breath, she averts her gaze to the fire. You keep your eyes on her, unable to take them away. "I just- I'm so tired, y/n." Your heart breaks a little at the words. You know how stressful it's been for her lately. "School has been awful. I'm not failing because I've put all of my energy into it, but I don't think I have any more left to give. I'm going to start failing- and when that happens, my parents will be so upset with me. And I won't be able to act in any more plays if my grades get too low." Her voice gets a little shaky, and you squeeze her hand one more time to calm her down. She sighs, glancing down at your hands one more time before looking back at the fire in front of her. "I don't know if I want to stick around here to see that. I- I don't think I could take it. It would be too much."

You furrow your eyebrows, the words concerning you. "What do you mean you won't be able to take it? You're so strong, Jen."

Immediately, she shakes her head, and you see a single tear fall down her cheek. "I need to leave this town. I need to go. If I don't, I don't know what I'll do to myself."

Your hand untangles from hers, leaving it to instead hold her face in both of your hands, turning her to look at you. You both shift your bodies slightly so that they're facing each other. She reaches one hand up to lazily rest her fingertips on your arm. Closing her eyes, several tears fall. "Don't say that, baby." You whisper, rubbing her cheek with your thumb. She relaxes into your touch, but she can't stop the small sobs that come out. Pulling her close, you wrap her in a warm embrace as she cries into your chest, not caring to be silent anymore. The sound almost makes you cry. You hate seeing her in pain, and this is the result of her bottling it up, of her never taking a break. You stroke her hair rhythmically, trying to soothe her as best as possible. It takes a few minutes, but eventually her breathing slows down, and her grip on your shirt loosens, and her whole body relaxes. The muffled sounds of the party inside is so contrasting to how the girl in your arms is feeling, but you know that it's somehow calming you both. You're both slightly in a daze, but a small giggle from Jennie snaps you out of it, your heart beating at the sound.

"What?" you ask, a small smile forming on your face.

"I'm going to fall asleep if you keep stroking my hair like that." She mumbles, the drowsiness from her cry already apparent in her voice.

Your smile widens at that, letting out a chuckle yourself. "Go ahead, you can fall asleep. I can wake you up in an hour or two." Your voice is so filled with love and genuine care it makes Jennie's heart burst. This is when she's happy. Nights like this. With a sigh, she stays in your arms for a moment, and you think she will actually fall asleep right here, but she sits up, looking at you. Her eyes are puffy and slightly red, the sight making your hand reach out and caress her cheek. She hums at the feeling, her eyes fluttering closed for a second before she gently pushes your hand down to rest on her leg instead. When she opens her eyes, they're filled with a fondness that's familiar to you. It's the way she always looks at you, and it never fails to make your heart skip a beat.

"I love you." She says, so quietly it's almost like she exhaled the words. You open your mouth to say it back, but she cuts you off. "Don't. Just let me speak." Closing your mouth, you nod, listening intently. "Hopefully, I can get through this without crying this time..." you both laugh half-heartedly at what she says, before she continues. "I love you, so much. I don't think I've ever loved a person this much in my whole life, and- and I don't think anyone's ever loved me so much either." You place your hand on top of hers, and she does the same with you, your hands stacked atop one another in care. "But I meant what I said," her voice cracks a little bit, and you're worried she's going to cry again, but she composes herself. "If I have to go another month in that place, I- I don't know if I'll be strong enough to take it."

"I'll be there for you, Jen-"

"Even with you with me." She says. "As selfish as that sounds, I just know. And you're right, I'm smart, and I'm strong. But even I know what I can't take. I've been draining myself ever since I entered school, ever since my parents put so much pressure on me to be perfect. And I'm using what little strength I have in me to make this decision and leave." You nod, not knowing if you should speak or not. She looks at you, shakes her head with a laugh, then removes her hands from yours, looking down at her feet. "I'm going to leave either way, whether you come with me or not." The thought makes your heart hurt. She would really leave you? "I don't want to." Her eyes are back on yours. You wonder if she heard your thoughts. "If I left without you, I'd be happier than I am here, but I'd still be hanging on by a thread. Only... the thread would be stronger, I guess." She bites her lip, not sure if the meaning got to you. "Look, what I'm saying is I want to go with you. All you have to do is say yes- and- and I know it's a lot to ask of you so suddenly, but I need to know. If you need a night to think about it, I'll give you it, but I need to go soon and I love you and I'll only be fully happy if you come with me."

Taking a moment to process everything she's saying to you, you sit there. She just looks at you, her eyes pleading for you to agree. To just say yes. To get rid of all her stress and worry and fear with just one word. But, you can't. That's never been you. You like to dream, but you have to be rational. You can't get lost in it. You have to give all decisions some proper thought.

"How soon are you thinking?"

You can tell that a question isn't exactly what she wanted to hear from you, but it's not bad. It still gives her hope, so she sends you a small smile. "I don't really have a set date. Before the month ends."

"The month? That's in two weeks, Jen!"

"We can make it work! I know we can." She reassures you, "Two weeks is a lot of time. And- and besides, that's not the deadline, it's only ideal. I would be okay within three weeks."

"What?" You ask exasperatedly. She shrinks at your tone, and you sigh, rubbing a hand up and down her leg lovingly. Her eyes watch your hands, not wanting to meet your face out of embarrassment. "Look, it's not that I don't want to go with you, Jennie, I- I do, I think." She scoffs at your uncertainty. "But you can't just expect me to blindly agree! You're already so stressed, if we leave unprepared, you'll be under even more stress. Where did you even want to go?"

"New York."

"That's... that's impossible."

"Stop speaking like that!" She exclaims, a hint of anger in her voice. Her eyes are narrowed at you now. "Don't you love me? Don't you believe in me? I have money! I've been saving up money for the past few months, and up until recently, I didn't even know why. But now I do. My body has always known what I wanted to do, okay? And I have always pictured that with you! So could you just please say yes and we can figure this out another night?! Please?" Your eyes soften at the desperation in her voice. What can you say? What should you say? "Please," she begs, "every night I feel like this sadness is going to consume me. Like- like an ocean, like the waves are engulfing me and I'm drowning, but then you come. Baby, you come to me." Her voice is cracking, and you see a line of water threaten to spill at the bottom of her eyes. "You come to me and you pull me out of that, like you're my breath of fresh air. You're my oxygen. I can't breathe without you, y/n. Just take a chance on me, just this once. Let me be the most important thing in your life, let me be selfish with you, _please_."

_No._

_No,_ you tell yourself. _No, no, no, no, no._ Over and over again. You should say no. You know this probably won't last. You know that even with all the love you two hold for each other, there's still a big chance you both will end up working yourselves to death trying to live, especially in New York, where everyone is trying to make a living.

Yet, the way she's looking at you is just too much. It's filled with too much hope, and vulnerability, and desperation and fear and want and need and _love_. She loves you, with every bone in her body. And it's the mutual feeling that you have that has you shaking your head _yes_. That has everything in you sending alarm signals to your brain as you say the word, "Okay." And you almost can't believe yourself. You almost want to take it back. To end things here, to tell her that you'll still support her but you can't leave with her.

But then her whole face lights up. Then she flashes that same gummy smile at you that you've come to love. Then she throws her arms around you and squeals in excitement and you hear the most joy from her voice in months. Then you realize just how much she's been under, and as much as you've tried to help, you've never really seen it the way you do now as she grips you so tightly and thanks you repeatedly. And then you know you couldn't have said no, no matter what. You know you wouldn't have said no in any universe, in any world, in any place, no matter how much or how little convincing she tried to do.

You hug her back, laughing happily at her small sounds of excitement. She pulls away from the hug, only to capture your lips in a kiss. It's filled with emotion, with passion, and you two can't stop smiling and laughing in between kisses that you can never kiss longer than several pecks. You can taste the salt from her tears on your lips. You could bask in her joy right now. You are. For someone who was so hesitant only a few minutes ago, you feel like you share the same amount of excitement for the future as her.

"I love you," she whispers, her forehead leaning on yours as she stares into your eyes. Her hands are cupping your face intimately. "I know I'm asking for a lot."

"I don't care." You say, and you definitely do not. "I would throw it all away for you. I _will_ throw that all away. Because you're right, Jen. I'm your oxygen. And you are mine. And any life with you away from me is meaningless."

She laughs sweetly, "You're so cheesy."

"Says you. You just poured out your heart to me using several literary devices."

"Ew, no school talk." She complains, before capturing you in another kiss. This one is longer, now that the happiness is beginning to calm down and settle in you two. It doesn't get too heated, but you both only pull away when you need to come up for air. You both sit there for a little bit afterwards, giggling together at the high you're feeling. "See, doesn't it feel good to take a risk?"

"Only with you, angel."

She hums, pecking your lips one more time. "I'm so glad I met you."

You smile. This girl is about to ruin your life.

"Me too."

**Author's Note:**

> If you stumbled upon this, hope you enjoyed loool, it was inspired by LIS: Before The Storm, or more specifically the character of Rachel Amber hehe. Sorry if it's shitty or if it feels rushed, but it was just an idea in my head :) lmk what u think or smth if that's what ur heart desires !!


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